Am I just being too naive...are people really right about you? Or do I just know you so well that I don't need to listen to others? I can't decide anymore...my belief in you seems so shaken. I've fought for you all the time but this time I'm failing miserably. My heart refuses to accept that you of all people could be calculative. Yes, you did catch me at my weakest time...and you knew very well that I needed you more than anyone else....and you, as every other time, were there for me. I don't want to believe that was out of motive...I didn't see it then, it seemed to me like you were giving me time and space to consider your feelings...but instead, everything you told me, everything you did made me weaker and for the first time in my life I was insecure. At such a juncture, I just couldn't bear the thought of losing my best friend. I've never been insecure or jealous...could that mean something? I decided too quickly that it did.
I understand how you feel and why you might have calculated your moves...but does that make it right? I don't know. I was so dazed, your "plan" worked perfectly on me...but is it right to lay out a trap to "lure in" the one you love? I don't know that either. You know me better than anybody else...how will I ever believe that everything that is happening is not calculated? How will I believe that you won't continue playing on my weaknesses?
If the fear of losing the one you love makes you think and device foolproof plans...then I'm not even sure if you can call it love...